Friday, October 14, 2011

another sista gettin' hitched

I have only the vaguest idea of who this guy is; I've yet to meet him. And I have yet to see a photograph that cements him as a conceptual "someone" in my mind. But in Las Vegas (was she kidding about the Elvis theme?), this coming Sunday, he'll be marrying my dear, crazy Cody.

When we attended Simone's wedding this past spring, she told me about him. I'll call him Nick. I got a scanty portrait. I can't much remember the details. I do remember the feeling I got from her as she spoke about him, though. Cody herself, as I know her now, is such a grown-up, more together, more beautiful, and seemingly softer (in a way I can't quite put my finger on) version of her teen-aged self - the one who's hung out in my mind all these years. And from the talk we had, I get the impression that Nick fits snugly in to the world that she's made. I love that for her.

I'm a combination of disappointed and relieved that they're getting married in Vegas. Disappointed, because I had such an awesome time seeing Simone get married, and I'd love to be with Cody in the same way. I would have gone to her wedding had it been nearby, no question. But I do feel relieved that I have more time to gather the emotional wherewithal I seem to think I need in order to be around old friends again. It doesn't make sense, really. I'm doing so well in other ways. But it is what it is. Luckily, they're taping it, and I'll be able to watch it later.

They sent a "Save the Date" message for a reception they're holding in early December. Considering that Cody accompanied me to Simone's wedding, I thought there was a sweet symmetry in Simone accompanying me to Cody's reception. So we've both "saved the date."

I know it's going to be fun - and honestly, an honor. Most likely, I'll be the same ecstatic, joy-filled, teary-eyed fool that I was after Simone's wedding - but I'm not feeling it just yet. Please Lord, help me find that. Help me feel that up to and past the day!     


  1. You are at that age when it is a flurry of friends getting married. As the years go by it becomes a slow trickle with some second marriages here and there once the 40's hit.

    Mixed feelings are natural. I feel that way whenever someone has a baby because the liklihood of another child has passed me by. I'm still happy for them though. Emotions can be nuanced. We can feel opposite ones all at once. The thing about emotions, though, is that they get moved through, like a right of passage, and we end up on the other side of them eventually. That is, if we don't get stuck in them, which happens to all of us at one time or another....

    Jeff, your writing just gets better and better. You have found your style and it seems to flow effortlessly.

    Enjoy the wedding. I love how these can be livestreamed now so those people can attend from a distance. I had no idea!

  2. Hey Suzanne, thanks so much for the love!

    It's true, our capacity to feel all that we do is amazing. I never get tired of all those nuances. It's such a show!

    I watched the wedding - and there was an Elvis! She looked so beautiful and happy. I'm so glad I was able to "be there."