Saturday, November 7, 2009

look and you will see (over and over again, always, forever)

My beautiful one,

As I promised, I'm always here. I'm here now to help sort out your confusion. You've been asking, you've been wondering, and you've come to need reminding from me in this way again. Tripping over all your anxious ideas is leading you nowhere. Let us see if we can bring you the clarity you're after.

Again, you are taking unnecessary steps trying to get where you want to go. You are wandering around, searching for "shortcuts," imagining what the maps of other people say, confusing and overwhelming yourself by all the avenues that lie before you. You are over-thinking things way, way too much. You're overlooking the fun that is to be had. You're blinding yourself to the wonderful realization that you're already where you're trying to go - if you would but open your eyes to it, and simply embrace it.

You keep turning back, grasping to the idea that another person's path is more viable than your own; that another person's coping skills are more reliable than your own. You keep believing that another person's truth is somehow more worthy of being looked to. This just isn't so!

Do you remember who you are? You are silent, still, pristine, all-encompassing Awareness. You are the Presence in which all paths, ideas, coping mechanisms, decisions made, and relative truths are contained. Without you, without your perceptions, all else could not be. There are fazillion-kazillion perspectives that you and I comprise - and all are Source. Do you see what this means? There are as many "truths" as there are perceivers of them. You are each a Universe unto yourselves; the All is contained in each.

You've been puzzled by your recent instances of fear. You wonder what the experiences are trying to tell you and if you're relating to them wisely. You've been wondering how to handle it when it happens again. (And you don't even consider the idea of "if." You are confident it's a "when." Isn't there something just a bit mixed up about this?) Let me ask you: how have you been handling it heretofore? Then, yes! That's it! That's exactly how you were "supposed" to handle it - and you did very well. That is how you're "supposed" to handle it - until you choose another way. Let this interpretation be enough. Really look at it and you will see that it truly is enough.

You've wondered if your "patterns of behavior" have been dysfunctional - but it seems to me that your fears, and the way you've lived with them, have been functioning just fine. You've survived haven't you? You've experienced what you sincerely hoped to experience (regardless of how you judged it later), haven't you? It's your looking back at what you've done and telling the story of how you were wrong that creates all the trouble and all the negative emotions that you feel. It's not your experience of fear that hurts you; it's your judgment of your experience of fear and how you respond (or don't respond) to it that hurts you.

Every moment there are things occurring. In every "sliver" of "time," things are taking place. But remember that each "sliver" is self contained. Each "sliver," each little "happening," is doing what it does - and has no meaning, no relationship to you or any other point in time - save for the story you superimpose on to them.

If someone were to come up to you with a gun, demanding all your money and fear bubbles up inside of you, you might quickly decide to hand over your wallet because it feels like the easiest (and is probably the smartest) thing to do. Once the situation is over - then that is what happened; that is how that scenario took place. Period. But what you tend to do is then go back over it in your mind and judge your particular reaction as being wrong. In this situation you might say, "I shouldn't have given that guy all my money. I needed it. I should have kicked his ass; I should have defended myself. At the very least, I could have taken my chances and made a run for it - at least I'd still have my money. I shouldn't have been such a coward. I shouldn't have given in." And on and on you'd go.

It's a dramatic example, but the point is clear. When you're faced with a situation that does not feel comfortable to you, you are faced with limitless choices of how to respond - and each one of them is valid. But then you'll look upon what occurred and tell stories about it - usually based on how you imagine other people would have reacted or what you imagine people will think of you because of how you reacted. In each moment and in each choice, all you have to do is what feels right to you - even something that you might later call cowardice - but who knows, you could just as easily see it as bravery or wisdom. But in the moment, that's apparently the choice needed to be made because I/God/Reality know how to do what I am meant to do. So, give it up! Give up the idea of even having to make a choice. Give up the idea that a wrong choice could be made. The thoughts you have, the feelings that follow, the action that's taken - will all play themselves out. Just be loyal to them. Be honest about them, do what you feel guided and compelled to do. And know that one day, you may just make another choice. You may just happen to decide on another course of action. You may decide you want another sort of pattern. And when you do, you will have the assistance you need - and it will reveal itself, unequivocally, as the choice to be made.

I've been noticing also how very fond you've been lately of looking back at your experience in Florida as perhaps being a mistake. You're very invested in this role you play of being somehow capable of cluelessness, aren't you? - when you know good and well that you aren't. Stop, stop, stop trying to interpret your story in comparison to other people's perceptions. Stop giving your power away. Stop doubting your greatness. I see your time in Florida as a glowing success! You did accomplish what you set out to. You were wanting Life - and that's what you got! You did jump in to the unknown, you did have faith, and I did support you - did I not?

Who says that just because it didn't turn out the way you thought or hoped it would, that it didn't unfold exquisitely? A shorter span of time does not equal a lack of quality experience lived.

Were your plane rides and layovers not enjoyable to you and did you not get to and fro safely? Did you not encounter friendly people along the way? Did you not appreciate the grandness of the hotel you stayed in and enjoy the view from your window? Did you not by "happenstance" meet a stranger who wound up displaying great generosity towards you - with their kindness, company, time, and rides to your appointments with potential roommates and to points of interest? Did you not love being near the water as you walked along the pier? Did you not find each of your potential roommates to be polite and interesting, and did you not enjoy your time and conversations with them? Do you not, even now, enjoy remembering your time there? Don't you love the inspiration that was given rise to, that continuously calls you forth toward your next great adventure? Do you not see how I provided for you?

Can you see just how much you are loved?

Trust your feelings and impulses always. They are how I speak to you. They are how I let you know you're headed in the right direction.

Stop taking yourself so seriously. Enjoy who you are being - and who everyone else is being, for that matter - because every last one of you are doing the best you know how.

If you get "lost" again, all you have to do is seek me out. Invite me in, so to speak. Look for me; expect me. You are being supported in every moment. Remember that each action you take is Divinely inspired, Divinely timed, and what you need and want (with all of the inherent rightness that goes along with them - and which your very existence entitles you to) has been given.

Do what you do.
And whatever you choose, make peace with it.
It doesn't get any simpler than that.

And I, Love itself - meaning YOU - is always here.



















2 comments:

  1. these words are like a balm to my soul. thank you so much for posting this!

    ReplyDelete